LOVE AND WHY
WE have heard and read numerous poems and emotional verses about what we call “Romantic Love”. We have heard and seen families fall apart because of the ensuing battle of two people to live together or have also heard about their failure to keep up post-marital understanding and intimacy. Hence we conclude that the so called FEELING is temporary and fading. So is the shallow judgment. Let us take a look at the facts a little bit historically and scientifically. In the beginning of the world perhaps, the concept of a mutually respecting couple as a basic unit of society may not have existed because there was no need of it. Creatures all over just needed to ensure propagation of their respective species. We can see that as creatures evolved from unicellular loners to reptiles, birds and then mammals the concept of group living, herds, prides etc. of animals came into effect. Simply civilization and growth of intelligence fuelled and supported the concept of “single mate” or monogamous relationships and wholesome living within the community became as important as living and surviving itself. . So the concept of choosing a mate did not stop with having a family alone, it continued into care of newborn ones until maturity. You can see that in many bird species including the Penguins. (It is a charm to see a Penguin family).
Then came in man whose predecessors, the Apes and Primates demonstrated COMMUNITY LIVING and GUIDELINES of Group living. Then man’s civilization levels grew and man began appreciating woman than just the bearer of his offspring. Appreciation and care was the basis of love. What else can it be?. Monogamous relationships exist throughout the animal kingdom without the social ritual of Marriage. But we humans do have the practice. They say it is not just intelligence but the power of empathy and understanding that makes man “MORE INTELLIGENT” than the rest of the species. The concept of CHOOSING A MATE gives a creature his independence in life. If animals can live satisfied with that till death, what is the harm if humans had to do the same? For majority of the population (whether they admit it or not) life is all about Loving and being Loved. What more can satisfy a living creature? Imagine the conception or creation of a child without love? Does that even seem right to you? No. It doesn’t because that means moving backwards in the evolutionary ladder. If you are the individual unit of a community and your bonding with another being will create a new complex unit called family, the choice by nature’s way, by the way of Higher intelligence must be yours, in fact yours only.
We call the concept of true love farfetched and impractical. We call those who believe in it as dreamers and fools. Well listen to this, Reptiles live, protect themselves, choose a mate within a short time, produce offsprings BUT THEY DO NOT FORM CLOSE BONDS WITH THEIR MATES NOR THEIR OFFSPRINGS. Their emotional range is all about fear, anger, vigilance and sensing danger. Do you get it? So if you live a life with no bonds and call yourself a practical party animal, you are right, you are the animal, moved far behind in the evolutionary ladder. Simply put, if you are intelligent by nature you must be able to LOVE and make lifelong bonds with people and understand that intelligence is not just about math and knowhow. In fact you can see people with High IQ as well as a Good social behavior as well as an adequate Emotional Intelligence.
Courtship is the act of meeting, impressing the other partner and deciding on whether a family together would be suitable. Human beings do that the LONGEST, which is beautiful. They meet, get impressed and feet-swept by each other. Show each other that they like each other, dream, appreciate, associate them with little and big things, remember each others’ birthdays express care, concern, loyalty, sincerity and give up for each other, fight for each other, protect the other, stand for each other and then promise a lifetime together. Imagine the brainpower necessary to process these complex information and manage other things in accordance to these. The satisfaction released by Endorphins in the brain by the thought of love acts as a natural stress reliever and pain killer to handle the other pressures of life. Nobody teaches people all these too much. They feel it themselves. Non-verbal translation of Intelligence and information. Now tell me who is STUPID? the ones who shun love or the ones who appreciate , ADORE and CELEBRATE it?